Alicia "Lovely" Previn - American Violinist, Songwriter, & Recording Artist

Alicia Previn has lived most interesting life. She began playing the violin when she was about seven years old and was classically trained at the Royal Academy of Music in London. She grew to be an accomplished instrumentalist having been, as she puts it, "born into music". If her last name sounds familiar, it's because she shares it with her late father, Andre' Previn, Academy Award winner and composer, who was tremendously influential in film and music for the better part of eight decades. But Alicia found her own path. Granted, it took some unusual turns through the experience of living in a cult environment as teen, but later weaved her way in through multiple roles in music as an instrumentalist, singer, composer and teacher.   

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Transcript

Alicia Previn:   0:00
Hi, it's Dr Shepp. I know that you might have been waiting for a while for a new episode, and I just wanted to touch base and let you know that everything is still moving forward. As is true for many of us, life sometimes makes schedules more difficult to manage, and the COVID-19 virus has made that all the more difficult. So thank you for your patience. And we look forward to getting more episodes to you as soon as we're able. And as often as we're able. Be well, everyone.    

Dr. Shepp:   0:34
Thanks for tuning in to manage the moment. Conversations in performance psychology. I'm Dr Sari Shepphird.

Alicia Previn:   0:41
I'll just play whatever comes to me right now. But if I think about it too hard or when I'm just playing in a band, even that's usually when I get in trouble. It's not as good as when I feel like I could totally let go and try and hear what I think. Music is being given to me.  

Dr. Shepp:   1:00
Alicia Previn has lived most interesting life. She began playing the violin when she was about seven years old and was classically trained at the Royal Academy of Music in London. She grew to be an accomplished instrumentalist, having been, as she puts it, born into music. If her last name sounds familiar, it's because she shares it with her late father, Andre' Previn, Academy Award winner and composer, who was tremendously influential in film and music for the better part of eight decades. But Alicia found her own path. Granted, it took some unusual turns through the experience of living in a cult environment as teen, but later weaved her way in through multiple roles in music as an instrumentalist, singer, composer and teacher. And I enjoyed learning from militia during our conversation, and I hope that you will as well.  

Dr. Shepp:   1:49
Hi, Alicia. Thanks so much for joining me this evening. Thanks so much for having me. Yeah, I know. It's it's gonna be fun. I'm really looking forward to hearing about your life in your career because it's been quite a road thus far, and you've done so many things already to date in your career and live such an interesting life. So I'm looking forward just to kind of delving into some of your experience.

Alicia Previn:   2:10
Thank you. I hope it helps your audience. And you know, I'm I'm new to your podcast, but I know how popular you are and how how well received you are. So I'm excited, to jump in.

Dr. Shepp:   2:22
Oh, thank you for that. Well, I'm excited to jump in as well. Um, I would love to hear a little bit about how you developed your love for music, because I know we'll talk about the various ways that's shown up in your life and how you've displayed that that love. But how did you develop your love for music?

Alicia Previn:   2:40
Oh, my gosh. I think I developed it in the womb. I came from a family of musicians. Uh, people have heard of my dad, of course, but my mom was also a jazz singer. And, you know, now that I've had a child, I know that I played a lot of music. I thought it was important for him to know that was pre existent from him. And then when he was a teenager, he started listening to that music. He knew all those songs. So I just I just know that I was born into that. And although sometimes it skips a generation and I know people that are incredibly talented and nobody else in their family place. But, um, I just always saying my mom's songs. I went her rehearsals. She's jazz singer, and I loved all of that and listen to mostly you jazz growing up. And, uh, I love that music Now I'm starting in the last couple of years to be folded into jazz bands, which is something that's like a lifetime of learning. It's so lofty. It's so amazing. It has that incredible structure and yet freedom at the same time. And, you know, because all my parents did that, you know, I've talked to them, I've I've been involved with that. But then, you know, like everyone else in my family, I was given a piano lessons when I was six years old and I got so far. And then I my teacher, scribbled out the fingering numbers. And so it's fun because I've been a teacher now, and I do anything to make it fun and interesting for the student, whether their Children or adults, if they're still using a crutch of fingering or something. So what? You know, it's like you're not gonna be wearing diapers in college, whatever, whatever helps. But then, after a year. I have this funny idea. I'm seven years old and I want to play the violin. Nobody else in my family played it, and my thought was, and it's almost like prophetic. I think now, because it cracks me up. I thought, Well, I want to play the violin because you can carry it around And in those days, you couldn't really didn't really have many electric pianos you could carry around. And because you can play all kinds of music now, that's astounding, because the most common question I get asked, Besides, can you play? Devil went down to Georgia.

Dr. Shepp:   4:57
The devil went down to Georgia. He was looking for a solo studio is Do you

Alicia Previn:   5:01
play country or classical? And yes, I was classically trained by some of the greatest musicians teachers in the world. But I moved away from Classical as a teenager because it for various reasons, but I've really felt like I've tried to break every mold in violin and play every kind of music that I love or I'm interested in trying. Um, most people still act like they don't know what to do with me. You're a violin will stop trying to think the violins only place certain kinds of music. It's just an instrument that I know how to play and I'm familiar with. But I can play horn parts. I've played in Led Zeppelin cover bands. I played in reggae bands, you know, has nothing to do with it. So I just always loved music. And I always loved playing with people. And I remember when I started moving away from just following music on a page and making my own music, I met a guy played acoustic guitar, so I used to jam with him. And then one day I remember he had a friend that joined us that played the bass Well, I thought I'd gone to heaven having the bottom covered like a bass player. Just that all that was the beginning of me going into music as a career and really pursuing it. Just that kind of playing with others, you know, and playing together.

Dr. Shepp:   6:22
I'm wondering if jazz helped you to do that, your background in jazz as a child because it is so different in its structure, you know it's not the same. It's not the same thing on the two in the four. And it's that you're not like you're doing the same rock beat every single time. And I mean, there's so much variation to it, and you you have to interpret it in a way that you don't other genres. I wonder if that had an influence on your desire to play different kinds of music and just have that freedom.

Alicia Previn:   6:51
It might have been that my sister had a friend who, when he saw me moving away from just wanting to play classical, he gave me a tape that had Joe Venuti and Stephane Grappelli in kind of the beginnings of jazz violin And you know. Then there was hot Ratso Frank Sap on, you know, then different people that I started to discover. But one thing I thought was so amazing is when I started working with my step dad, Mondello. He's one of the great guitars of jazz. I mean, literally in the world. He left us in December of 2017 but he started to. I wanted to do an album with me, and he started teaching me some songs and had be learned him, and then we'd play them together, and I remember the first time he was older and I got to be his roadie, so I would help pack up all his gear, take him to the gig on packet. Let's wait through through the gate. Is our mom really got to the point where she didn't want to stay the whole night, helping pack up and then take him home. And then one day my mom said, You know, you might want to bring your violin along like why you might want to sit in and my heart just started pounding. I was kidding. So I put my filing in the car and I drive Dad to the gig, and then we get there. Unlike Chief Ad, you know, do you

Dr. Shepp:   8:04
want me to bring my violin? And he's so cool, You know, you

Alicia Previn:   8:07
might as well. But when

Dr. Shepp:   8:08
we started working on the album, I'm sitting there saying, Well, you know, I've

Alicia Previn:   8:12
got this thing about John Coltrane changes that I'm practicing with them. What are these scales and worthy? And he say, Look, you learn the melody and you keep that in your head the whole time you're improvising and all you do is play around with the melody. Now that blew my mind. I'm thinking that's all right for you who've played for your whole life, played jazz and understand whole tones and all these different kinds of aspects of music you've written. You've taught film scoring. You've played orchestra stuff, but, um, I understand it more and more all the time because you take the melody and you you work with it. You play it back upside down or backwards, or you know scales around it or whatever, but you constantly have to have that in your head. And the more you understand everything, the more you can go places with that and it. To me, it's just a lifetime of learning. I don't think I would ever say, I don't have anybody could say they master jazz. But some people are incredibly gifted, and I'm just in awe that I get Thio try and I get to do it in about two or three jazz bands and and we we're about to play a new gig in Carlsbad, a pretty nice place, so we'll see.

Dr. Shepp:   9:26
Well, that's really cool. I think it's neat how you have that lifelong learning attitude about it, but I can hear it I mean, I can hear the passion for just being able to develop your craft, which is different than what you might hear from someone who's classically trained and then stays with the classical music and perhaps refines their skill but doesn't include the same the same depth of wanting to learn. And I'm not trying to not classical violinist because, of course, you have different pieces, and then you can interpret the difficult pieces differently. But you're talking about delving into music as an entity, not just an instrument.

Alicia Previn:   10:04
Exactly. And I got to go over to Japan a couple of years ago, and we were taken to the university and I went up into this room where there they had interesting names for these rooms where they were students that were studying sixties music. So I went in, and so we started playing cream and we started playing all these cool 60 years ago. They were looking at me like you're a violinist and you play this and we had so much fun. And then they be downstairs to the classical section, where in the hallways, thes kids were practicing their Tchaikovsky or practicing whatever they were doing and I went over to this young Japanese guy and I was introduced to him and we were chatting for a minute and I said, So do you ever play without the music? And they looked at me with these bug eyes, like, What are you talking about? And I said, Yeah, you should try it. Just play from your heart. Just don't look at the music And I just could have been talking any language that he didn't understand. But I think he something inside of him. Maybe he try it. I don't know, but I do like that. I do like trying to get kids obvious one kid, and he's improved a lot since I've been teaching him, and I thought, Well, okay, I'll bring some Christmas music around Christmas. So I brought typical well known Christmas songs, and one of them he knew. But I had printed from the Internet, and I for I didn't realize it was two pages, so I brought the one page, and I was really thrilled that we were playing along and he just followed me. Even though it went off the music, he knew what is supposed, and he did pretty Well, he did really well and, yeah, I know he has a good ear, you know, he doesn't work very hard at his practicing, but it s O. And I thought he had to do a performance of dust in the wind. So I wrote it all out for him. And I spent a lot of time teaching him the difficult passages. And, you know, I think you did pretty well. I didn't get to be there, but I but his mom was thrilled. Anyway,

Dr. Shepp:   12:00
you've taught a number of people and you've played with so many people. What would you say? Your opinion is on how much of one's ear is genetic and how much of it is is learned or developed.

Alicia Previn:   12:13
Ah, well, I know as a kid, I had perfect pitch. I remember being playing outside in the front yard of my mom, hitting a note on the piano inside, and I would tell her what it waas Then later on, I think maybe you have to practice that I don't know. I'm not an expert on that, but I know I have relative pitch. Um, I can take my violin and tune it, and it's usually perfect because all these years of doing it, But I did have a student who had nowhere. I mean Big Girl. Her hands were about twice as big as I will mine. And when she first started, she couldn't tell an attitude. No from and tune note. But after a while she got better at it and she could hear. So I think if you're a violinist, I mean, it's so funny. I have tried a lot of electric violins, and there was one particular kind I I bought. I ended up selling it cause I didn't like the sound, but it had these things he called phantom frets. And what's so funny is I'm used to playing guitars and bass is where the friends were there and you play in between the threats, right? Well, what was weird about this is these friends we were supposed to put your finger on them, and it goes against everything, especially in the kind of classical world that would be horrific. Oh, my God frets. So I remember asking him, you know, So tell me, why did you do that? He says, if you ever played in a really loud band and I went. Yeah, just about every band I've ever played in his bed. And a soon as I could hear myself, they told me I was too loud. He said, You know, you're you're right because you can look down at your fingers and know that you're right. And I said,

Dr. Shepp:   13:42
OK, I get it. I'll give you

Alicia Previn:   13:44
that. But of course. You know, with a classical conductor, composer father, I mean, no, just he told me that even the idea of an electric violin was repulsive to him. Wasn't like he accepted what I did, really? It all. He loved my melodies that I wrote, um and he said he was gonna write a really arrangement of that never happened. Unfortunately, but, you know, busy man. But I keep pressing on. I have the new album written, and I'm hoping Thio, please get it out soon. I'm waiting to find somebody to mix it for me, and, um, I've been writing some themes for TV shows, and that's really been fun. But I digress.

Dr. Shepp:   14:24
No. Well, no, not at all. You're not addressing all. It's all very interesting. I'm interested to hear about your process when you compose because Of course, it's really different than interpreting music that's already been written. But is your process one where it's just kind of fluid in it? And it happens continuously? Do you sit and try to connect with yourself or with your idea of what you're having for the music? What's your process like when you compose?

Alicia Previn:   14:48
Well, okay, if there's a few different ones I have to say over the years, because I've been riding since I was in my teens or twenties. Okay, there have been some, you know, in the beginning I had to write it on violin, so somewhat limiting. I mean, I came up with some great melodies, but then I always had to go and find somebody to help me with the court. No. Can you play the major that are minor? No. And so that was difficult. But eventually I taught myself enough guitar and what's funny about not really being a trained guitarist but being able to play guitar. And my son has told me this is that a lot of people who write songs on guitar, they write the cords that go along with the melody. But because I'm not a trained guitarist. All right chords, and sometimes I learn a new court and I'll just make a song out of it. But my melodies are Go counter to that so that he says that he's suggested to me that makes him more interesting rather than just following along with the courts. But sometimes I'll just make some chords. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night. I wrote a song recently where I woke up with this phrase in my head, Um, in the midst of see and And I think it was in the midst of the wall. They heard the call or something and it and I thought, Okay, yeah, went up, went to the bathroom, came back, laid down and it kept going around and around. I said, OK, flip on the light, get my pad out And what I do tend to do is all. If I have lyrics coming, I'll just keep going and I'm hearing the next line of the next words, and I just trust it. And I just keep writing until I can't ride anymore. Or I think, Okay, I need a bridge or, you know, I'll just see sometimes I get it all out and it's complete. I have vs that air, have a similar rhythm and then a chorus or whatever. So sometimes it does all flow out like that. Um, And then there's been other times where I went away to Arizona for a month just to go to the monuments, and I took my little baby toward us with me and I took my guitar and I tried some different tunings, and I wrote some songs. And then I put the lyrics on top of that. So there's different times. And then there have been times when I've had a melody, and it was kind of only half of something. And then a month or so later, this other melody came to me. A lot of times I wake up with it and they fit together and made a song. It was interesting, or I again I was away. Somewhere in this place in the south of France, I got the opportunity to go to this beautiful place, woke up in the middle of night for in the morning, find a quiet place and get my phone recorder out, and I seeing these two little melodies and Now it's like one of my favorite songs. It's about the Mediterranean, which is where I Waas and I named it after the place and my son help me put waves in it and all these vocals and, you know, it sounds like when you close your eyes and listen to the song. You actually feel like you're somewhere in the Mediterranean, so there's lots of different ways that

Dr. Shepp:   17:43
it happens so interesting to hear about, because it is like speaking another language. You know, you talk about it because it's internal to you, and so much of it is national. But of course, someone who doesn't play music or doesn't have compositions come to them wouldn't wouldn't understand that. But, um, you've had different influences in your life, and I'm actually wondering how that impacted your own your own process of composition because you had the influence of your mom, Betty Bennett and listening to her and and the jazz background. But then you had kind of a contrary or contrast influence in your dad, the famed composer and conductor Andre Previn, who was more of a perfectionist on DSO. How how did you navigate your way through the different musical influences in your life to find your own style and your own vibe,

Alicia Previn:   18:37
you know. Ah, to be perfectly honest with you, I didn't grow up around my dad. I saw him on weekends from the time I was about five. Is what I understand you. You don't remember a whole lot before your three, sir, I I understand. I didn't really see him, but then I saw him on weekends, so I wasn't involved so much. Sometimes I'll be watching. In the old days, I'd be watching an old movie and I might notice the music. And then at the end, I see the credits, and I realized my dad wrote it, but I didn't even know. So, you know, there's a lot of stuff he wrote kind of before I was born, or when I was very young, that I may still to this day not be that familiar with. And then there's the stuff he did for Oscars. But that was taking other people's music and putting it onto a movie, which is a certain skill you get an Oscar for. But he's written violin concertos. He's written operas now, and all this other stuff So I really, honestly, I didn't like his composing, and I think it's because my analysis of it is, um, he had a very difficult childhood where he grew up as a child prodigy play piano and instead of a child receiving the kind of love and hugs and that kind of affection that we need, it was always play for us, Andre play for us, Andre. So I think he put his love and affection into Look what I can do, you know, kind of thing. And so I always found his melodies were Oh, here's a beautiful melody he had, But then he purposely twisted it to sound Aaron Copland Sound Bader and kind of ugly in a sense and Just and I All I described that wants to this man that wrote a book about famous people's kids that I got to be in it. And I said, I feel like it's like he has a chain on his heart where he can't busted out and just love and be free to write

Dr. Shepp:   20:48
in

Alicia Previn:   20:48
whatever it always. It's like he has that as the beginning of what he writes. But then his mind gets in the way and he says, That's one thing, my violin playing that if I think too much about it, if I'm improvising, which is my favorite of all is pure improvisation, like just if you're if you want that, I'll just play whatever comes to me right now. But if I think about it too hard or when I'm just playing in a band, even that's usually when I get in trouble. It's not as good as when I feel like I can totally let go and try and hear what I think. The music is being given to me. You know, it's funny because you mentioned that, uh, people who don't have that in them. And I love the fact that one of my favorite classical pieces of all is Igor Stravinsky's The Rite of Spring on. You know, when he first performed that way, way, way, long time ago, probably 100 or more years ago, they booed, They stomped, they threw things, they hated it. And I learned recently that what he said was he didn't compose it. It came through him and it makes so much sense to me because it's so how could anybody have come up with that. I mean, if you know the piece, it's unbelievable. My son showed me that they have actually a thing on YouTube where there's a a color graph representing each instrument in the orchestra that shows what they're doing. It's almost as fantastic is listening to the piece. Just you look at it really illustrates that it's Yeah, I know that Fantasia two obviously a big part of it was implantation, But it doesn't matter. It's just it definitely is. So belts. Um, it expresses something that you know I can't be thought. I just feel like it's thoughts don't come into it as much as I mean, he obviously had to write it down, so you had to understand each instrument and how to write it. But it must have been quite a process if he says it came through him and he just had to get it down on paper. And that's how I feel. Like a lot of the composing I've done has been, you know, where I just feel I've got to do this like I've got to turn on the light and write all this and that that phrase that I had where I flipped on the light and I stayed up. I've never written anything like it had talks about stampedes and blood and people being captured, and it was something very different than the normal. I don't write love songs, necessarily. I write songs about actual real problems that people have that we all deal with, and maybe a way to help yourself get through it. But, uh, this it definitely is something that takes over, I think, and then you just have to trust it, and you can go back and edit it, too, and make it better. I've done that, too, worked on lyrics. You know, I don't always just I trust everything that comes out, But it's mostly there

Dr. Shepp:   23:55
and that trust you developed over time as you as you got to know yourself as a musician, Would that be fair to say

Alicia Previn:   24:02
I think so. And, you know, the other thing is the album I put out last year at the end of the year before their songs, I wrote while I was on tour with bands for years and my friends that were either in bands or I played in their band or whatever, Um, you know, I have a chance at some studio time and they would come in. And where is a lot of people's demos Air Justin, acoustic guitar and someone singing? I have horns, the guitar and bass and drums and all kinds of stuff, you know, singing. And I had these for years. I never did anything with them, you know, they were never put out. And I remember my son saying, How did these songs do? Mom? I said, No one's ever heard them. So a couple years ago, we decided to call it rare tracks. And I put out an album and, um, we just mastered them because, you know, a lot of people say that demos have a certain magic, you know, that you can create, try to. It ends up kind of sounding dead. So that's what we did. We just mastered them, and I have him out, and it's funny to hear them. But I I know those songs are still good today. I mean, they could be redone, but I'd feel like I need to have a band, and that's the one thing with all the moving around and things that I've done that's been the hardest is to have a band of people that I've played with, people that love my music. But they're busy making money, playing in bigger things, you know. So that's always a thing. The best thing you could do when you're a songwriter is to have a band available to represent that, you know, they just immediately play the sound that you're hearing

Dr. Shepp:   25:39
her hit. Yeah, yeah, that That kind of support, I'm sure, is invaluable.

Alicia Previn:   25:44
Yeah, I know what I'd like to have, So I've been able to recreate it. I've done my original songs now, since I put the album out. I think I've done it three or four times with people, and I've had a bass player right off the charts for me. I mean, it's just been amazing. It's been great. Um, but you know, hopefully, this year I'll be doing that more. But then the other thing is, nowadays, so many bands are doing covers. It's kind of like the movie industry. They just keep doing the same remakes, right? There's definitely room for original music, but, um, you have to kind of get your foot in the door first, it seems, with covers so or have somebody else to your song. I've always admired Carole King. I always thought that she had the best of all worlds because she had so many artists have number ones with her songs. And then every couple of years, she take your own band out and doing the way she wanted that to me. As a singer songwriter, that seems like the ultimate wait. Did it?

Dr. Shepp:   26:40
Yes. What? What a great combination. That would be absolutely well, You not only have the talent on instrument, you also have vocal talent as well, because you you joined the London Symphony Orchestra when you were in high school.

Alicia Previn:   26:53
Yeah, the course that was an amateur chorus, but it was super fun. I mean, I traveled upon train from where I went to school, which was down in the Sussex area to London to the rehearsals. And, you know, there were people doing their needing. I mean, it was just It was what they called an amateur course, but it was huge. And we did very difficult pieces. I wish I could have done belt stars feast, but I graduated. I wasn't able to, but I did. D'oh! Um, Beethoven's ninth which I ended up singing in Royal Albert Hall with my dad conducting, huh? That was that. What was that like? That wasn't believable. I mean, I loved the rehearsals, and, you know, if you know Beethoven's ninth, there's It's the last movement where the chorus stands up, it sinks through the hole, and it's like I remember looking at my dad and and it's almost like I could see storm clouds over his head during the whole first movements. And then we got up and sing to sing, and it was like the roof came off. It just was fantastic. Uh, I wish I could have done more of it, but I do love to sing, and I've I've even in school the boys never wanted to see. When you start out with your little kid, everyone sings unison, and then you start doing boys and girls and then you start doing parts. But the boys would never sing, so I developed, as you can hear, kind of a lower voice. I I kind of lost my soprano edge because I always saying lower to make up for the people that were too shy to say on as you get older. I think your voice does go lower. I noticed with my mom she was more soprano when she was younger and now had to change the key of some of her songs as she got older.

Dr. Shepp:   28:32
I think your voice does drop a CZ. You get older, but you've been a lead singer. So you you certainly have a trained voice. Um and you, you lended it thio a number of different genres of music as you mentioned in a number of them. But also you've played punk. Yeah,

Alicia Previn:   28:48
Yeah, a uninterested band called Tim Bright Spikes That was led by two guys that have been in punk bands and a couple of others. But it was the way we describe it. It was, uh, punk meets classical and jazz. So it's probably the most creative band I was ever in, and I wasn't really the lead singer, but I got to sing along side with the lead singer and the only reason why I didn't do leave this because he really didn't want me to Ha Peter, The band did, but he didn't. And then later on, he asked me to join Ah prog rock band like a Kraut rock program and that he led and he'd had a girl young girl playing violin and singing on. He told me she was not good at violent at all. Um, she got by and we went on a We did an album and we did a U. S tour, and it was fantastic. I mean, it was a lot of work because there we also backed the Hawk Wind guy, Nick Turner. If you know who that is, if you're familiar with whom The Hawk Wind was older, banned from the sixties and they broke off into two factions, and Nick Turner was, you know, kind of ah, psychedelic prog rock guy. And so we travel around as two bands, so I would open up. I was the lead singer violin in our band called Headers Leben. And then I would run back. I like to do this because we're just fun. And I had a long blonde wig because I had my hair all chopped off because being the lead singer, it was a lot of work, and I danced around, move around a lot and play. So I, you know, I get hot. So it was great to have really short hair, and I just go and tell it off. And I put this big, long blonde wig and a little dress, and then I'd play the Moke synthesizer and do the backup vocals. And then I also played recorder and I played percussion and I played a violin solo. And so who? It was a lot of work, but it was really fun. So, um, but yeah, that was different. Singing prog rock was a little different than I studied it. A little bit of icing, like playing me some of the classic female singers, a prog rock bands and not like I'm in Duel and some of these ones from Germany. And it was pretty interesting, interesting project to do. I like the Al marvelous I didn't listen to for a long time, and recently I've been listening to some of it and one of that, one of the songs. Rarefied air. Some of the songs I wrote the lyrics and one I wrote the lyrics and the melody and was actually used in a kind of A B movie. But it was a movie called Diamond Cartel, and I guess it was the last movie that Peter O'Toole was in, which I still haven't seen, but I think I've made about three cents and ask up from that movie. But, uh, anyway, it's nice to say, uh, I wrote a song that ended up in the movie, and I told my dad that told Andre, I didn't tell that, you know, it wasn't a huge movie, but it was nice to be able to say, Yeah, well, it was in a movie, of

Dr. Shepp:   31:31
course. Uh, well, and you played on singles on CDs and you you appeared on the Tonight Show and and multiple bands that that you've been a part of. So you certainly have had a varied musical career.

Alicia Previn:   31:47
Yes, that's true. Oh, yeah, that the tonight show was fun. I was with this band called The Cage is a couple of guys from Alabama, and, uh, I met James Woods there.

Dr. Shepp:   31:58
Oh, yeah, that's

Alicia Previn:   31:59
funny, cause it was, um it was a Jay Leno version of the tonight show, of course. And, uh, it was really fun doing it. And then, you know, I I've met so many celebrities, and it's not like I don't care or I don't get excited, but I leave him alone because I know everyone. You know, When my dad was married in Mia Farrow, we were walking. When I first met her, I was probably like 11 were walking along the streets of New York, and I saw people realized who she was, and they started to freak out. Remember what? Shoving her hand a doorway so they you know, they lost her. But, you know, there was James was and I thought, you know what? I'm not gonna bother him. And he actually came over and introduced himself to me, so that was kind of nice, But, you know, I guess he likes violence,

Dr. Shepp:   32:41
huh? Well, it's one thing Thio Thio have a process related to composing. It's another thing to have a process related to performing. So when you're on a stage, that that, you know, is gonna yield millions of people watching you. What? What's your performance process like?

Alicia Previn:   32:59
I want them to see what a good time I'm having. People always say I smile all the time and I don't even know it. But I think a lot of people have told me over the years that you look like you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, what you're meant to be doing. And, you know, I've always had, I guess, a coll Eric temperament. I've never been afraid to perform. I mean, when I sing, I think I'm feel more vulnerable. Um, Then when I play the violin, I I've just Over the years, I got more more confident and people would say things that, like my mother wouldn't say to me about what it does them and how it makes them feel And and, uh, how, you know, I played in a lot of church bands and they say I take them to heaven or they hear my violin lines long after they left the building or, you know, just amazing things. Or, you know, when I was young and doing all of this touring, they didn't have the Internet. People weren't recording things on their phones, So it's funny because, I don't know, but I would venture to say I was one of the first that ever danced while I played violin. Not that anybody would know that, and it's okay. I'm so glad when I see violinists that do that. And but I my whole thing when I get to a place where we were going to perform, we did a three month tour of Europe with this one band that had number ones in in Ireland and in Europe that I played with in Ireland at the um, when we were on the tour, I had a 30 foot cord and again before wireless instruments, I think, and I would get to the venue and I would see how far my cord would reach if I could find a big pedestal or ah, high up place so that I do. I have a couple of solos, and I know that when I got to the solo, I would head up there, and that's where I do it. And I knew that I how far I could go. So, you know, I just always tried to make it a performance and poor all my passion out that I have in what I do. Um, that's I really do know that I was meant to do this. And, um, I'm glad that I've got to do it as much as I have, and I'm looking forward to doing it a lot

Dr. Shepp:   35:06
more. That's great. And you're writing a book to it is that about your career? Is it is a book looking back retrospectively what you've done so far. Is it something else in nature?

Alicia Previn:   35:16
It's a lot of things, you know, I've been told over the years that I should do a documentary on me or I should write a book because I've done so much of my life, so many things that you know this from the sublime to the ridiculous. Because, you know, I grew up without a father, and my mother had a career and she was trying to get remarried, and I was alone a lot. And so, you know, I tried to find my way without the guidance that I normally have. I loved my parents, but, you know, they're musicians. They're performers, you know. We don't come with a set in the instructions, you know. So I ventured out and tried all kinds of things when I was younger. A lot of people D'oh! And I learned a lot of great things. But, you know, some of it has shocked people. Some of it I've given talks about it too, especially moms that have kids, you know, like you really have to watch your kids and find out what they're doing. Don't just let him try and raise themselves, you know, because you could get yourself in trouble. So I've had some very interesting things happen in my life that people think I should write about. And so you know, I've made some time lines. I'll probably want to get somebody to help me craft it, because there's just so much, so many different aspects to it. But I've had people say, You know, you should write about the fact that you're you grew up without a father or you should write about different things that I've had to deal with. I know I'm not alone, but I know there's always I mean, then I write Children's books. So that's another thing. I've written three Children's books about mainly about the love of the earth of soil and where your food comes from, about bees and earthworms and the desert animals and how they're threatened by a lot of things. And my next one's gonna be about kids that have to move because of military or divorce. So you know, it's funny. I never thought I'd be a teacher or write anything. But I ended up getting my and child development and teaching preschool and first grade a little bit on. And then when I discovered there was politics and that I really had to get out because there's politics in every job. But when you're dealing with families, it's more heartbreaking, you know, stuff. So but yeah. So I started writing a song about wrote a song about earthworms because I worked with the master gardener from one of time. I was a teenager and I love gardening and farming and all that kind of stuff. So I wrote this song about earthworms and on my salt son heard it a lot when he was growing up. And then one day somebody offered me to go in the studio and actually recorded and produce it. And and then I looked at the lyrics and realized I had enough information about earthworms nonfiction type thing to write a book. And then I did the illustrations, and that's where it started, you know? So, um, and the one about bees, I have a video and a song called Give Peas a Chance So I'm not right out. Yeah, so I s Oh, I've

Dr. Shepp:   38:09
tried a few different things,

Alicia Previn:   38:10
and then my desert book was considered quote unquote controversial because I suddenly realized that, you know, the desert that we have here the Mojave and the California Nevada desserts were being scraped and millions of acres of solar panels were being put there. And so they were not only destroying the desert, which is actually a beautiful place. And people get this attitude like there's nothing there, but it's teeming with life and botany and you know everything else. So then then the the tortoises were dying and birds were flying into the wind things, and they're flying into the mirrors of the solar and dying. And I'm just thinking, you know, to me, that's not truly sustainable. So you know, our future kids should be able to look at this a better way than maybe we did. And so, you know, the animals have a meeting, and then, you know, the tortoises called the teacher in Native American. I also met some Native Americans who their sacred sites and burial sites are also being scraped away and damage. So the combination I used the combination of those two and the animal's going to the Indian guy and the Native American guy and asking for help of how to save the desert and save them. So you know, I just and then the back I was have a practical application. So the earthworm one teaches you how to build a little worm box where you could take your scraps from the kitchen and feed him to the worms and then use their castings for your garden and then the desert one. I talk about saving energy, and then the B one has to do with. I got commissioned by a guy that makes wonderful products that are you being used all around the world that make you not have to use the chemicals. And it's putting the friendly bacteria back in the soil. So it's making the plants much else here and even with more nutrition and more flavour, so that helps the bees

Dr. Shepp:   40:03
and the desert book is called The Strange disappearance of Walter Tortoise. Yes, that's what did you did the illustrations for that book as well.

Alicia Previn:   40:11
All the time I actually had a friend, and he and I went out to the desert to the same kind of area, and I had in mind the different scenes for the book. So we took a load of photographs and then it was really fun that my son, my sister, who does graphic art She's credited on the book Claudia Previn, but she helped me show showed me in photo shop how you make the two layers. There's the animals in the actual desert. It's a mixed media think so I just was thrilling. And then we added some shadow to make them look like they're actually, they're so, Yeah, each book is different, and it's funny because I learned something about the publishing business that most Children's publishers have their artists that do all of their books. So they have a similar look, and then they have people that right now I was trying to present my books as being both, and I realized that that's not okay, that they don't They don't go for that. Yeah, but I'm in touch with some other publishers, and some other exciting things were happening now, and I might even do some animated versions of my books, so that would be that's, you know, kids today they won't even listen to an audio book anymore. Apparently now I mean and that's that's so funny. The irony of that is that you know partly reason why I wrote those books as I want. I know as a gardener and a gardening teacher, even two little kids, how much they need to have that tactile experience and know that before screens. This is what soil is, and this is how the best soil is made. And these little guys have on Leah mouth it all eyes or ears. But they do something more wonderful than even what we can. D'oh! And you know I've had. When I've taught in schools, I'll bring a wheelbarrow full of compost and there's worms in there. And after I teach her about planning and what then I'll say, OK, go find some worms and have had teachers come up. Look at me. That kid won't even get their hands dirty, but

Dr. Shepp:   42:03
they're in there digging

Alicia Previn:   42:03
for worms and I just smile and I say, yeah, it really need this, huh? They can't sit at a desk and raise their hand all the time. You know, when I gardening and third grade that just blew that just opened it all up for me. I felt with it right then

Dr. Shepp:   42:18
and I've heard some animals in the background. As we've been talking, I've heard some frogs and I think that was a cow. So you're surrounded, hopefully by animals, since that's part of what you love about life. Oh,

Alicia Previn:   42:31
well, I wish they were real. The frogs are real, though. I'm at my son's house and they have a pond outside. I know it drives my son crazy because they wake him up and he falls back to

Dr. Shepp:   42:41
something, and then they start with

Alicia Previn:   42:42
one little croak and then, too, and that also allowed. But yeah, I do have a phone, and I use animal sounds. A rooster text. I have, ah, cow, but a good smell. I have a horse. That's a reminder horse winning. So, yeah, some of are not really, but I love him.

Dr. Shepp:   43:02
I do. That's funny. It's funny how you fooled me. You certainly have had such an interesting life thus far, and I know you're embarking on some new things that that'll probably just increase the the interest of things in your own life and then people's interest in you. But I I did read that book that you had mentioned earlier about the famous people's kids, and I was surprised to see that you had an experience that not a lot of people could relate to. Um, having been a part of of the source when you were a teen, Um, and I can't even imagine how that would have impacted you. Um, but I'm wondering how if you can anyway, because I'm sure it might be a challenge. But how could you just encapsulate the effect that it had on your music? I mean, was that a time when when music was was growing in you, or was it stifled in you? I mean, such a such a different thing to live through. Oh, actually, you know, it probably was the most freedom I ever have in music, and I can being very young. But when you're young, you think you could do anything, you can reach the stars. So, uh, when I was in that situation, because I needed to feel like I belong to a group I like it said earlier I was alone a lot so and no father, but that there were bands within that source, and we had a rock band was like a folk rock band, I guess, and and we really We had people going out trying to get us record deals. I was so young. I was just singing and playing my violin and letting everyone do the business. I had nothing to do with that. And it wasn't done properly. Perhaps I don't know what the reason is, but we made a record. And recently somebody sent me a cassette copy of it, I think. And that was amazing to hear it again. But nothing ever happened. Excuse me. Nothing ever happened with that. And then there was also another kind of a heavy rock band that was all improv. I never really I got to play with it up with them a couple of times more recently, and it was fun. But the father figure or the leader or the cult guy? Whatever you wanna call him? Yes, he was a father. Substitute me for me for a while because there was no one else around and I needed that. Every little girl needs someone to tell them that they're beautiful. They're proud of them. They're good at something. And what he used to do all the time was when we lived in this one little area in Hawaii called Monica I. And it's a loop road and it's, Ah, white sand, turquoise water, very shallow, like a reef out there. And we lived in this house that was way up high, and it had a big deck around it. And he used to say, Why don't you just go outside and play your violin? Play whatever you want, just go for it and I would literally wander around outside and just play whatever no particular songs, just make it up. And uh, that was just that, I think probably had a huge influence on why I love to just pure improvisation, just without any real thought about anything. And I'm sure it has classical and Irish in another kind of overtones and sometimes gypsy. And recently I started playing with a a bunch that were kind of Russian, French and, um, Ukrainian, and they played some traditional songs that traditional sunset. I mean, there was a gypsy thing that came out of me. I didn't even know I had, So I think it goes back to the Eastern European side of my my family because all what I consider the greatest classical violin solo so have all been Eastern European and Isaac Stern. And you know, all these guys. It's funny how that is. But I was told in that then to just go out and play. And then one of the ladies again, never had touched one in her life. But she got a harp and they recorded a lot of it. I haven't heard it in the recording. Somebody has thumb somewhere. I'm sure some of it is a tonal. Who knows, because she didn't really know what she was doing. She's just playing the harp by field, doesn't know what she's doing, and I would play along with her. And I also played with somebody from those days who was a dancer, and we were actually on The Gong Show in 1977 brings back a lot of memories, and I have to tell you one story Chuck Barris is It was a crazy wild guy, but I wore a top hat. Aaliyah target fishnets and cowboy boots with big silver stars on him, and I used a wall up like an echo pedal, and she wore this kind of off the shoulder pen, a velvet red thing with these feathers and tucked down the front, Very exotic looking, shapely girl. And she danced and I would play the violin. And I would make these crazy sounds with the delays or whatever. And I come up with these melodies and we would play off each other and so she would twirl and I do a trill or, you know, I do something and she dance off of that. And so we have this little synergy thing that we did and we went on the gong show. It's funny because they all looked at each other. They never heard anything like that before. And she would. She rides around, and then she pulled these feathers out, threw him in the air, and they looked at each other and they kind of shrugged. And they gone, Gus. Oh, no. So we started to walk back there, and Chuck Barris can probably No, no, no, don't leave because you might have won the weirdest act of the weak. And what is that way? Did we actually, in fact, one year I tried to look it up on YouTube, thinking, Hey, you know, maybe it's there. I never found the actual performance, but I found the one at the end of the week where they said, you know, they bring everybody on and they say in here is the weirdest stuck in the week and, you know, they showed a quick clip of us, so I never did find the full one, but, um, it was kind of fun, but yeah, that was something else. I did. And then we actually wrote some songs based on those melodies. We went on a tour, went to, uh, Florida and New York, referring formed in CB TV, and we did some private performances. And, um, the gay community loved us because back then, in the in the late seventies, we were these very expressive women, and I I guess they really loved that about us. But, you know, we had quite a fun time in New York playing in all these little cool clubs that probably most of them are gone. Now. I think CBGB is finally gone. Or maybe it isn't. But that was such an amazing place. S o. Many great artists played there, and yet we went back to why We wrote some songs, you wrote an album, and again, I don't have a copy of that album. But it would be very interesting to hear now because all those things that I wrote improvisational E she took and wrote actual songs out of them. I don't remember any of them, really. But so, yeah, that was actually a really good experience, Kind of almost a out of body experience for me, as far as music goes. Is that part of what you talked to parents about it because of your experience? A teen is when you're saying two parents, you need to know what they're doing and and and be involved in their lives is Is that part of what you're sharing? I think that's that. Was there, take of it. I mean, I was told that I was supposed to share this in front of this body. Women and I brought a lot of notes, and I told them a little bit about my childhood in my teens and how I went through that, and, uh, people react different ways to it. You sure? But, um, I think most of the women felt like they better keep a better eye on their kids, especially their girls, because, you know, it's it was completely we thought we were part of the age of Aquarius and, you know, uh, just a different lifestyle, very different. We lived together in a kind of community. There were families within the family. But back then there wasn't much of, ah, good relationship as faras. You know, most of the cult's around in those days were very destructive or are scary or murderers are I'll kill themselves or whatever. So you know, there wasn't a positive one. We got persecuted a lot, you know, and we were just trying to live our lives away from everyone else and do our thing. But it was scary to most people. Um, I learned a lot of really practical things. I mean, he was a nutritionist. He had very successful restaurants. He was a judo champion. I mean, there were a lot of good things about the leaders character, Um, even though he went off on some aspect, But oh, I showed I finally got to show the documentary to my son, and I think it helped him because he grew up with the mom that has have of these interesting experiences. And I think he understood a lot more about who I am after. Seeing I'm sure was an important moment in your relationship with your son because you're sharing a part of your life that I don't think would be understood by most people, let alone someone, um, who's looked up to you and you've raised. So yeah, I imagine that would have been a really important moment. It was. And I was surprised at his reaction, very happily surprised that No, he hugged me and he just felt like he really understood me a lot better. And, uh, yeah, I mean, I know for parents, it's a nightmare. But every child has to have their time when they separate from their parents because they're becoming their own identity and they have to kind of push you away. And that's natural. They have a whole rituals about the rites of passage for men in the ancient civilizations. And, you know, for women we get our time of the month, and that's what we know. But but, you know, that's the thing about it is is that, uh, you can give them all the best of everything. And I was always told when my son left that Ah, the tapes are running. That was always very encouraging to me. That's saying they you know what? I told them this, and I tried to treat him in that, and I gave him this and I showed him this. Why doesn't he follow how I'm, you know, outgoing, and I work hard and I do this and they said, You know what? When they leave, the tapes are running. And I thought, OK, and I held that close to my heart and man, despite me, he turned out a wonderful person. The most beautiful adult relationship, just like, oh, about anything. Oh, that's wonderful. I'm glad. I'm glad. And he's very musically talented. I think he has way more than I have. Oh, is that right? Yeah, but he's devoted to the art side, and I've done the art side and the commercial side. So it's my career, so I have to make money at too. Well, I hope people will look into your music and to your book when it's out. And, um, and to come hear you play. I've actually had the pleasure of seeing you play. Um, I don't remember what year, and I don't even remember the name of the building. You were. You were with a band. What I do remember was, um I actually do remember that you danced while you while you played the violin. Um, and you were introduced to somebody who did that. That I recall that quite quite clearly. Now, um, and I remember the smile on my face just thinking, Well, that is a lot of freedom upon stage. But I don't remember much more about it than that. It might have been the young Dubliners. Possibly okay, because I have a lot of performing with them, and yeah, I always did get up on the bar and crawl along and play for people. And yeah, I really There were poked marks in the ceiling above my spot because I was dancing all night and my bow would poke this. Yeah, that's great. I'd like to just shift and ask you some questions that I ask everyone If if that's okay with you, let's go for it. Okay. I'm so Alicia, what in life are you still curious about? I'm still curious about, Okay. Why is that a hard one for me. Um, people. I'm just always been curious about people. I love people of watching people. I'm curious about. What makes them sad, happy. You know what touches them. I guess I'll just always be curious about that, because over my lifetime in my career, I've had so many people come up to me and say things like I said before about my playing. So the fact that art and music and things really touch people and change people that that's always fascinated me and which is more distracting to you as a performer? Is it? Is it the praise that you receive for your talent? Or is it the criticism that you might receive O criticism? Definitely. Uh, there was a funny thing that happened to me once with a magazine in England. We were I was in a band and we were Irish and we played in England and we were put put in this heavy metal magazine, which we shouldn't have even been in there. And when I read this person's other writings, I could tell that even if it was a Mozart concerto, they just hate violence and they hate Irish people So they put this beautiful. We were on our way to America to do a tour, and they put this beautiful picture of me on the front page. I think you're on, like a bull's picture. And I looked at it, and the title was the worst filing in rock history. You know, I bet he couldn't even name five rock file in this someone, you know, even if you asked him, right? It just It was just It was I don't know why he wrote it, and I mean, here I am revealing this, but, you know, I'm just I'm being really, really talking. So, uh, but not just about destroyed me on the flame over to America. I was crying. I just couldn't believe it. How could he say that? Um And then, you know, the more I talk about about it inside myself and two others, I just realized it was his narrow shot, and it had what didn't really have any to do with reality, because I know I'd put out a good performance that night. And being the child of the parents I'm in, I'm extremely critical of myself. I'm I'm terrible on every flaw I can't even listen some recording sometimes because I hear every flaw and everyone thinks it's great. And I'm just I've got that fine tuning that I have genetically, I guess so. Very over critical of myself. So there's a perfectionistic side to you. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, And yet I love Thio Get down and, you know, play funky and dirty and everything like that as well. But But, yeah, when a violin is, I sometimes tell people it's like a love hate relationship. Sure, because I love to play it, but it's so dang hard, and you can never just kind of relax and play it. You haven't possibly be concerned about your intonation and your tone and your bowing. It's no wonder it's called the most difficult instrument, one of only a couple. So right and then, having been classically trained, you have that that component to it as well. Where there's a seeding of perfection in Yeah, yeah, In fact, that's one of the reasons why I decided, You know, it's okay that I'm not gonna play classical music because the thing that I was 11 years old and I met one of the wonderful young Korean. I think she was Korean herself, South Korean of violinist that my pop discovered and it went to a concert. And afterwards I was 11 years old and I was talking to her about what she did, and she said, Well, you know, I really left half a family and I said, Well, I can't shoot She said, Well, because I practiced 8 to 12 hours a day and I'm always on tour. Something in my heart broke their man. I went, I don't want that life if that's what it takes. And then I learned because my teacher, wonderful lady, played with Yasha haIf. It's who was considered the greatest violinist who ever lived, and she wanted me to play for him. Now I know, because of who she was, that she wouldn't have suggested that if she didn't think I had talent. However, I was terrified. It never actually happened. Joshua Bell played for him. There's some videos out there where you can see it, but it never actually happened. But later on in life, I learned, and this shows you how super critical and, you know, especially having a pop. Who I had is if you play for him. And you weren't what he considered an absolute genius. You know what he did? Plummeted at the door and said, Get out. Can you imagine? Could how that would crush you. So have that never happened? But, you know, Yeah, they're just all these little things that that, uh, I've dealt with, but at a certain point, I thought, Well, okay, Why? At 13 I thought I started to learn all the big classical pieces that every violin, this place is that Wait a minute. Why do we all have to go down the same path? Then why? Since these composers are all gone now, I noticed that you'll perform it. And then the critics tell you whether they think that you interpreted right well, who they have to. They know what that's their opinion. So I just thought, This is just too twisted. This just seems something wrong here. To me, that's saying something wrong. Like if you could play something with the composer who's alive, who tells you how he wants it interpreted. But no, I don't want anybody everybody tearing you down because they don't think you You did that right in that person isn't even. You understand what I'm saying? I do. It's similar to ah, classically trained ballerina who has to dance the peace precisely as it was intended to be danced with with including every fine movement and and positions of her hands, his or her hands, Um, and a lot of dancers who gravitate away from that because it's it's just too much precision and a demand for perfection that can sometimes suck the life out of of someone's relationship with music and with dance. So they choose a different genre of dance. Yes, actually, I did do some improv with a ballerina, and she wore her toe shoes and everything. It was at a church, a Malibu, Um, I forget which church, but yeah, we met, and we have both been classically trained. We both have straight away, and we went into this room for about an hour and just tried stuff out, and we did 22 performances in two different church services, and it was amazing. I'm sorry we couldn't have kept going, but we both had that same turn that we took after all of that. And then, you know, the other thing I found with so much classical violin, concerto music, that type of music, it seems to me, because I know what it takes to do that that it just seems like it's overly hard and I feel like I lose the beauty and I met another cellist who told me that he agreed with me. He said. When you go to a classic concert, you're wowed by the technique and the ability and you leave and you don't remember a damn thing. But he felt like the music that I play. It actually, you know, touches people. And that's what's interesting. One of the jazz bands I'm in, a lot of people, I think, think of jazz is untouchable, like it's over there. It's too difficult. I don't understand it and it almost becomes background music. And so the guy that hired me to be in his van, I could tell that I wasn't your typical trained jazz player. But we're also choosing songs, say, from the sixties and stuff that are really cool and easy to digest. Let me say and we stretch out the intros and we stretch out the endings and we kind of and we're finding that people are entering into it better on Dhe. They're enjoying it, and they're actually getting more involved because it doesn't seem so untouchable, Just like classical music. It's amazing, and I love it, and it's incredible. But I felt a lot of the violin stuff is just so hard, but all I could think of what I'm listening to it is what it took, How much practicing what it took for them to have to dio instead of this is a beautiful piece. And that's why it's so important for every performer to define success for themselves. Because what might be success for one person in who writes singles in the music industry? Yeah, it might look very different for someone who wants to be an indie artist, Um, and similarly, in different performance genres outside of music, I think it's important to define your own motivation in your own your own success. Yeah, definitely. I'm not bet Met violin this to want to take on the hardest piece they can. Okay, you go for it. Well, as a performer, you obviously prepare for every every time that you play. Yet the unexpected can happen. What is something unexpected that has happened to you when you're performing well. Things like playing stuff. I didn't even know I knew how to play. It's almost like someone else is holding the instrument. And I'm just, um, observer. There have been times when that's happened quite often, and yeah, it's it's amazing. It's just I r. Or, you know, it's a genre, something I haven't tried, and I know what to do or I I hear what I should do on my fingers. Do it and I didn't know I could that that must be an amazing feeling. Yeah, it iss it Z. I don't use this word very often, but it's also I imagine, what, what a great experience to have. But it also speaks to how well trained and how experienced you are, because I'm sure that lends itself Maur to you being able to adapt like that. Well, the other funny thing is that I'm left handed and there were no left handed teachers when I was growing up. And so Boeing has always been more difficult, and again, when it comes to classical, there's a lot of very technical Boeing which would have taken a lot longer for me to master But I feel so in touch with my left hand when it comes to melodies and my heart directly my mind in my heart being able to express what I want to because that's my dominant hand and that's I felt like that's a good thing I've tried to play. I can't. Somebody had a P base, which is my favorite kind of base. But it was left handed and I thought, Oh, great. And I picked it up in my right hand, just couldn't make notes. It just was not. I'm sure if I lost if I had to, you know, you hear of people lose ability of a hand, and then they have to make the other hand. Were. But yeah, I just thought, Now I'm I play right handed just Well, I've already asked you about the criticism or the praise, and you mentioned a headline that's stuck with U. S. So it may or may not be the same answer to this question, but what is one comment that you've received that still stands out to you because of its impact? That could be good batter, for whatever reason. Uh, well, I've had some magazines and newspapers say that I live up to my dad's name even though I don't do what he does. But my mother used to say, You know what? You may not like what she does, What? She's good at, what she does. So when they said that in a couple of articles about you know Vanity Fair, I think was one or one of those kind of magazines it said, It's been said a couple of times And that definitely helped my confidence because I never really had any in the support from my pop. I had it from my step dad, Manel. He was very supportive and he loved violence or fiddles or whatever, but, um, I never felt like my dad. I appreciate it. And like, Why was I still doing music? Because to him, old school, you know, if you're good, you're successful. And I tried to explain that one day I remember saying, You know what? If there was this young man in somewhere in a tiny village in Spain who became great at classical guitar Oh, he'd be discovered How that by whom, And he just didn't get it. And I tried to say, Look at how many of the sons and daughters of famous actors and musicians are now doing it. That's either because they were in the right place at the right time. They were introduced to the right. People are, you know, that's how it works. And and that's the interesting thing about my life. Is that everything I've achieved? And, you know, you could say it isn't much, but for a lot of the people I know, they say, Wow, you know, I wish I could have done what you've done. I've done it all on my own, just going out with my violin and being willing to just get it out and play with anyone and everyone Good for you. You know, if I don't take it, that's when people tend to ask me to play s so you can try and take it. Everybody. Well, the one thing to breathe. I think that's a tremendous thing to be proud of about yourself, that you not only found your own way in music, but you defined you define success for yourself, and yet you you received the kind of feedback that you just mentioned, so I'm sure that's a lot to be proud of yourself. Yes, Thank you. It's pretty good. It's pretty good. I'm still ready to go off on tour and do everything so more. Okay, that's great. Well, in contrast, how do you move on from failure? Well, you try and fix it, okay? There was one situation worse. Something happened like that to me. It would never happen to be before in a studio. And so I went back, and, um, I worked extra hard and wrote out a part. I tried to just go in and wing something on Duh. I wrote it all out. And even though they ended up getting a cellist who had a friend who played violin and so they just went in and did it, I was supposed to come back and do it. Um, it wasn't a huge record, but it was just like some friends of mine. And I wanted to do it and they didn't tell me it was in, like, six Sharps or six flags or whatever waas And it meant from major to minor and all this other stuff. So I heard the song. I understood this song, but, um, I wrote out the part and I even sent it to them. And even though they said they got somebody else, I felt better that I did the work and I got it done, and I I could have done it. So that was one way I fits that. But failure, you know, we fail, but I don't like the idea of failure. So Right. Um I mean, I've had people throughout my life say you should be playing your violin all over the world, And, you know, in some ways I have, um but I still want to, and I still believe that's what I meant to do, and I will. So I try not to that the words fail and failure kind of feel like a weight aura, putting a period on something, and I don't I don't ever want to do. That's like people who say they never want to grow up. You know, I just the one beauty of of being a physician is that you never have to stop. You know, you may not look as good as you did when you were in your twenties, but but they're praising, you know, a certain person that did a performance at the Super Bowl because she's 50 you know, I'm at 50. I was still doing that and more so you know, that's great. 50 is the new 30 right? Well, I'm almost finished, but just a couple more questions. Have you ever had what you would say was a transformative moment in your work? And if so, what was it? CFC? I've had many, but I think most significantly would be what I've played in these up. Play for church praise bands, you know, and you're worshiping and praising God, you know, that's what you do. And when I do that, you know there's some people that can play it like it's a job. But for me, partly because I don't have to think about chords this I mean, I do inherently, because I'm playing a song that I know pretty well. All right, I can look at the chords, but there have definitely been times when I've had my icicles and I'm playing something and I feel like the ceiling opened up and you know, there's angels coming up or down or something, you know, like light streaming in. Or that I'm connected. I'm totally connected. And, uh, once you have a taste of that. It's it's really something. And that's why before I perform, I always hope and prays often prey than that. I'm gonna hear the music that I'm supposed to be playing. I'm gonna hear the notes before right as I'm playing them and hopefully my fingers will be able to do what I'm here. Oh, that's a beautiful sentiment That's ultimate for me, that ISS. But I don't think I'm supposed to be doing. And that's why I try and keep myself out of getting in the way of a of that, Um, that's that's a beautiful sentiment. Well, Alicia in in brief, you can try Thio 2 30 seconds or less if possible, that most people can't. But what have you learned about yourself in your particular relationship with music? That I will always work out it that I am not perfect, that I have a certain thing that I do well and I don't have to try and be everything. No, that's great. What a wonderful lesson to have learned. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I used to feel bad about it, but no, I if I didn't have all the things that people have said I probably would have given up. That's another thing that I said a few times in my life. It's like, OK, I guess I am supposed to do this because people seem to really like it. Well, I hope people will discover more of your work, and I'll look forward to hearing more about your book and your new album coming out. But I won't really want to thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to have this conversation. I really appreciate it. And I hope that others just get a feel for the breath of not only your musical knowledge and experience, but your creativity. So thank you again for speaking with me today. Thank you. Sorry. Thank you, Doctor. I appreciate you. And having listened, I'm excited to see what is going to sound like when it's all finished. Thanks. All right. Thing has been managed. The moment with Dr Shop Life is a collection of moments. It's how you manage the moments that makes the difference. You can subscribe to the manage the moment podcast for free just by clicking the subscribe button. 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